Baseball is Dead to Me: Volume 10,000

Rob Manfred in all of his infinite wisdom wants pass the rule changes of 7 inning double headers and starting with a man on second to start extra innings. On the surface both of these seem out of wack and like a sideways solution to a bigger problem. Well, I take that back. Seven inning doubles headers are flat out fucking stupid. Please reference the St. Louis Cardinals' 26 of them last year. I digress.

The game is broken. Blame it on whatever you want. Steroids, analytics, nerds, millennials, Arod, foul ball guy. The bottom line is the game does not fit the insane speed we all live at and consume entertainment. So all this talk about decreasing the full run time of the games is fine a hickory dandy, but we still have to watch David Price moan and scratch his balls for 45 seconds between each pitch that is either taken or hit out of the ball park.

Enough with the bizarre corky rule changes. Do what needs to be done to incentivize this game to become faster on the field. If I could watch 3 hours of stretching doubles into triples, spinning double plays home to first, pickles, suicide squeezes, hit & runs, spraying a single to right down 0-2, the pitcher getting the ball and oh I don’t know, pitching, ya know all the shit that made the game good for 100 years. I would watch that product.

While we’re at it go the other way on the DH. Eliminate it. Pitchers should be ball players too. And no more “specialized” arms out of the pen. And get the god damn pitch clock already. Fill the rosin bag with nails and eliminate that pussy “Buster Posey” Rule. Let the Joe Kelly’s solve those problems. So what does that take? De-Juicing the ball to increase the value of a HR? Expanding the strike zone forcing players to swing at pitches they can’t hit 400 feet?

In short just bring the game back to what it used to be and if that means completely ripping it down to it’s studs to build it back up so be it. Say it with me, Theo 2022.