It’s a Bad Year to Suck: The Patriots and the Purgatory of Pick #4
Let’s get one thing straight: 2025 is a brutal year to suck in the NFL.
You tank for hope. You tank for a shot at a franchise quarterback. You tank so that the next decade of Sundays doesn’t feel like a waking nightmare. But in the 2025 draft? You tank and get rewarded with… the fourth pick. That’s like crawling through the desert for three months and someone tosses you a LaCroix.
Guess who’s sitting right in that no-man’s land at No. 4? Our beloved New England Patriots.
Why? Because Jerod Mayo got out-sucked by none other than Sean McDermott—who, in a poetic twist of irony, coached his best game of the entire season in Week 18. Just enough juice to lock Buffalo into pick #3 and push the Pats to four. Thanks, Sean. We’ll send you a fruit basket.
Mayo, meanwhile, watched the final whistle blow in Foxborough knowing he’d just missed out on the real prize. Not just the top quarterbacks—but probably any real say in the flow of the draft. And let’s not forget that epic Week 18 win also ensured the infamous Day 3 pick swap. Yes, that’s right, we slid from a 5th to a 7th rounder. But hey—at least it was in exchange for the future league MVP: Joe freakin’ Milton.
I mean, that arm. The bombs. The zip. The rawness. He’s the prototype you dream about if you ignore three quarters of his college tape.
So now the Patriots sit in that fourth slot—right where generational talent just went off the board, and the next best option is probably a reach. Can’t even trade back unless someone falls in love with a cornerback or a left tackle. It's like being the fourth guy to choose at a pizza party and realizing all that’s left is Hawaiian with anchovies.
So yeah, it’s a bad year to suck. But the Pats? They didn’t just suck. They landed in the exact middle of draft hell—close enough to smell the greatness, but too far to actually touch it.
Typical.